Nocturnal News Update | 05-13

May Writing Challenge, Ask Jeffrey, and another body (dead) found in the Void.

Upbeat music crackles from an unidentified source. It ends abruptly.

Good evening, Night Owls.

You’re reading Nocturnal News, the only broadcast still legally allowed in your subconscious. I’m your host—The Narrator.

Here are tonight’s top stories, as dictated by the ghost in your dryer (the one that eats your socks—but only one from each pair).

Photo by Lallaoke on Unsplash

Last Call for Screaming Into the Void (Cooperatively)

The May Writing Challenge closes tonight at midnight, or whenever the timeline resets—whichever comes first. To enter, publish your story and tag the Narrator in a comment, a post, a restack, or through psychic projection. Psychic projection must be formatted in APA style.

This month’s theme, setting, and genre were chosen by popular vote and mild emotional manipulation. Read the full details [HERE].

And now, for next months polls.

And, one more—just for fun

The number you choose will determine how the final compiled story is altered. Let’s review the consequences, shall we?

Dialogue
I will change any and all spoken lines in the submissions I choose—and nothing else. The story remains intact. The meaning won’t.

Theme or Genre
The fully assembled narrative will change theme or genre, completely. Not a minor change, either.

You won’t know which number corresponds to which curse. That’s the fun.

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House of the 8th Update

Over in the House of the 8th, preparations have begun. You may feel a shift in your dreams (or nightmares), see doors that weren’t there yesterday. That’s normal.

The monthly update arrives this weekend. Paid subscribers will receive their invitation for a personalized tarot reading.

Welcome to House of the 8th

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Olivia Has Claimed Another Life

Olivia—possibly the last person you’d want taking a personal interest in your behavioral patterns—has returned. Chapter 2 dropped last week. So did another body.

Rumor has it, there may be a third before the weekend ends.

She’s twenty-one. Diagnosed with ASPD. Calm. Calculated. Morally efficient. A serial killer. You know, the usual.

Olivia [Ch 2] | Boundaries

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And now, over to Ask Jeffrey with your answers.

Scene transition music blares from unseen speakers. It is far too loud. Jeffrey is already holding a microphone. No one told him why.

Photo by Intricate Explorer on Unsplash

Welcome to Ask Jeffrey the Void Demon. I’m Jeffrey. The... Void Demon. The Narrator has temporarily reclaimed my other titles following the incident.

We are not discussing the incident.

Let’s begin.

Q: What’s the Void’s version of a houseplant? Like, does it scream at you when you forget about it? Asking because I might steal one, but I want to know first if dealing with it is cursed or just a mild inconvenience.

A houseplant…?

The Narrator has shown me these houseplants. They are—objectively—marvelous. Visually appealing. Oxygen-producing. Emotionally stabilizing. Ideal companions, it would appear….

However—

Many of them are also lethally toxic to select humans, universally toxic to the rest, and nearly all—when placed under direct human care—become rapidly, violently suicidal.

I once observed a plant thriving downwind of a collapsed reactor site west of Russia. It absorbed radiation like breath. Flourished in ash. I brought it indoors.

It died instantly.

Yes, I had read the care instructions.

As for your question—

The Void’s closest analogue to a houseplant is most likely Elliot’s former romantic entanglements. Beautiful. Complex. Seemingly self-sufficient. But catastrophically misaligned with long-term nurturing. You may offer them sunlight, affirmation, structured watering schedules… and they will still collapse inward from metaphysical root rot.

They are not meant to be kept. They are meant to be mourned.

Alternatively, we do have Void Flytraps. They are entirely self-sustaining.

Q: What kind of plants do you like??

Oh. That’s a very kind question. Thank you for asking. Yes. I’ve catalogued several.

Mimosa Pudica. No particular reason.

Mint. Yes. Mother Nature’s Original Sin. Once introduced, it spreads with single-minded devotion and zero regard for boundaries. You may think you've contained it—assigned it a pleasant little corner in your garden. Perhaps you’ve even given it its own pot.

It will escape.

It will multiply. It will return through the walls. Mint is not a plant. Mint is a decision—and one you will never be able to unmake. It is invasive, relentless, and deeply fragrant. I admire that.

Before acquisition, query: How many mojito’s will you realistically make? 4? 7?

It won’t matter—you’ll be too busy trimming mint leaves.

I am also particularly drawn to the Welwitschia mirabilis. Many observers assume it is dying. It isn’t. It’s just... existing. I relate to the dramatic flair.

Orchids are high-maintenance, manipulative, and only thrive under extremely specific forms of structured neglect. They remind me of Elliot’s exes. That is not slander. They would agree.

It’s what Elliot loved about them. He said they made him feel alive. They were always kind to me. Even when I wasn’t sure I deserved it.

There are others. But those are the ones I feel most... connected to. I talk to them sometimes. They do not always respond. That’s fine.

I don’t think love requires reciprocation. Only respect. And perhaps a little distance to grow.

Q: Do you guys have house pets in the void??

Yes.

Devoratus Animarum—colloquially known as Soul-Eating Space Spiders—are classified as pets…though this is dangerously misleading. They are not trained. They are not tamed. They are permitted to coexist. And they are scared of children. These entities are exclusively reserved for Void deities such as Wrath, who can sustain their temperament. They are drawn exclusively to human fear and feed on only, well, humans.

The Narrator is no longer permitted to host one. Not since—

…I am not allowed to disclose that. The Watcher’s orders.

Beyond that, we have many domesticated entities. Some of them are even kind.

Certain drifting organisms composed of smoke will cling to your spine if they feel safe. They have a similar class system to humans—pronouns. They hum when calm. If they do not feel safe, they will liquefy your internal organs and then organize the mourning. Mine is named Moss. They are nervous. But loyal. Should one approach you, do not offer food. Offer a blood-oath.

There are also wolves. Some of them are part-time.

The rest of the Void bestiary is sealed and not suitable for casual inquiry.

Thank you for your questions.

—Jeffrey (Void Demon | Other Titles Pending)

If you are a human—or otherwise—submit your anonymous queries below! No question too big, no answer too small—

—and there are only 3,456,789,123,009 questions that are off-limits!

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That concludes tonight’s broadcast.

If you made it this far, congratulations—your attention span remains intact. A rare trait in these times. Remember to submit your entries to the writing challenge before the 13th becomes the 14th somewhere on the East Coast of the US.

Keep an eye on your inbox, your basement, and your reflection.

If you have questions for Jeffrey, ask them. If you don’t, he’ll start making them up.

Until the next story,

—The Narrator

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